Singapore Gathering 12/12/2025

 

Hello from Alaska!

 

Wow! I can't believe this blog is still around. And I decided to say hi! 

It's cold here now middle of the winter (-15 deg C), and all snow out there. No polar bears unfortunately, but there are some moose walking around!

Poor moose post-holing through the snow!

The dusk/dawn is always nostalgic during winter, and beautiful! 

Frozen but beautiful! I guess I have told too many cold jokes to get this! Oops. 

First Joke in 2016

Since this blog has been idle for more than 5 years...I shall try to revive this blog. LOL...Please join the "ah bear" reviving effort.

The best joke of the year is
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
a joke that's not said, so that it will remain as the best joke yet to come. 

2011 下半年 听了想笑的电台广告 （个人觉得）

2011即将结束，为大家分享几个个人觉得好笑的电台广告

1. 某知名品牌代理商汽车广告
这广告的最后是这样说的： 详情请游览 www.CCB.mecerxxx-bexx.com.my
(谜之声：那念广告的一定很讨厌这品牌~~~~）

2.某婴儿用品广告
这广告的前面是这样的：
孕妇对老公说：“老公你整天对我的肚子念“三字经”，BB听得到吗？”
老公对孕妇说：“胎教是很重要的”
（谜之声：这位老爸你也太牛了吧，孩子没出世你就叫他"三字经" =.=）

3.某艺人介绍自己
他是这样说的：“大家好，我是 MELVIN 谢XX ”
(谜之声： 只能意会~~~~)

Thermography Course

Guys,

I officially ended my level 1 thermography and infrared camera application course. There are total 5 levels in this course:

Level 1: Basic shape tracing
Able to differentiate if your wife's a guy before marriage, right in the sack.

Level 2: Heat signature differentiation
Able to detect the number of people in a remote 'earthquake'. (happening in a car, late night, tepi jalan...)

Level 3: Medium wavelength thermal monitoring
Able to conduct peeping-tom role from another building.

Level 4: Advanced coloured radiation detection
Able to determine the number of red coloured 'hanging bridges' in an operating washing machine.

Level 5: Enhanced 3D+HD art of thermography
Able to trace left behind heat and replay past few minutes' event thus settle the argument on whether Lee An Hwa had rape Moo Sai Fu or not.

Useful ley this course? Go apply la...

(reading the whole thing now justifies why I started this post with ''Guys''....)

Body and Platform

Sometimes I do ponder on the similarity between our bodies and offshore platform:

Generator - Brain (generating impulse which is low concentrated electricity)

Pedestal crane - Arm

Compressor - Stomach

Gaslift Gas - Gastric Gas

Piping - Arteries

Crude Oil Transfer Pump - Heart

Well Head - Mouth

Well - Throat

and best of all.....

Vent to Flare - Butt to Fart

FEI-nion news - As it happened: YiuTP Curfew Riot Day 3

Report

Reporters: Casanova Kian, Situp Tan Zi, Window Lee, October Tan, November Chin, December Chong

1. 
   

   0100: The FEI-nion's Window Lee at YiuTP main gate says many are being here for the riot. The reason for this is the management feels they have additional powers to show to the students to saja implement curfew after 1am. We believe this is the first time that students are being so punctual for any event held in the YiuTP. There has been many positive messages from the students such as "*tut* you, we're *tut* doing what we want and you can *tut* my *tut* you *tut* little *tut* *tut* " and "here comes the real 2012".

   
   

   0114: The riot has just getting hot here as more and more students are joining. They even have two special corners fighting for the rights to wear hot pants, and they call themselves "The Ultimate Land Crocs" and "The Sotongz".

   
   

   0121: More and more groups are joining the riots. "The Far Socks Movement". "The Anti-Melvin Movement", "We All Love Mao Mao" and "Who The Hell is December Chong?" are also there.

   
   

   0230: The YiuTP Auxiliary Police released about three hundred boxes of tear gases, in the form of assignment papers and failed exam slip, sending all the students running away. However, there are a bunch of high achievers still remained, refusing to bulk away. The YiuTP Auxiliary Police had to resolve to releasing pictures of their mad parents.

   
   

   0640: Greater Iskandester Police release a first batch of 17 images and names of suspects who led the riot, namely Ho Pang Ko, Ma Kus Chan, Tan Wen Tat and Biu Tee Suan.

   
   

   0800: Ministry of Pets and Pests (MPP) statement: "We have enough prison rooms in wee-six for those that are sentenced to custody. There is substantial capacity in the prison system."

   
   

   1348: The Federation of Extreme Idiocy has refused to admit on sending supporters to the riot. President FEI says "We would not done so. It should've been a good business to rent supporters to such happening event but no, we are not going to admit our involvement in this riot until somebody found the evidence of us doing so. But I stand firm on refusing to admit to this accusation as all evidence was burnt."

2 Meanings

Teacher says, there are two meanings to the below sentence:

"Turn on that f*cking machine"


*No prizes for those who can get this lame joke.

Na Xie Nian - Those Days

Na xie nian, we all knew each other during MAS,
Na xie nian, we all walked all the way to jarum emas,
Na xie nian, we go ipoh by bus,
Na xie nian, we all sleep front row in class,


Na zie nian, Chong Kian basketball court there buat pengsan,
Na xie nian, Melvin go taman maju all the way jalan,
Na xie nian, Pangkor in toilet very tu lan,
Na xie nian, we laugh until bueh tahan,


Na zie nian, Boon Tat lakon MTV,
Na zie nian, Tee Hooi nangis berlari,
Na xie nian, Xi Yi show secret skill how to park kenari,
Na zie nian, Yik Lung everyday Tronoh there 漂移(Phiu Yi),


Na zie nian, we all prank Thian Hui Ching birthday,
Na zie nian, at back road hill Hui Ching shouted hey!
Na xie nian, JJ sang 千里窗外,
Na zie nian, KK pose 胸毛很帅,

:)

Za....

jeng jeng jeng....

Ok

OK....OK...everything is OK when you say OK..

Damn OK

Blardy OK

OK!!!

Famous Quotes By People Born on January 14

"The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for." Maureen Dowd Andy Rooney (Born in 1919); American Journalist.

"The purpose of human life is to serve and to show compassion and the will to help others." Albert Schweitzer (Born in 1875); Humanitarian and Theologian.

"Excuses are tools with which persons with no purpose in view build for themselves great monuments for nothing." Steven Grayhm (Born in 1981); Canada Actor.

"Happiness? That's nothing more than a good health and a poor memory." Albert Schweitzer (Born in 1875); Humanitarian and Theologian.

"I just outsmarted myself. It was an easy word. I just made a stupid mistake." Samir Patel (Born in 1994) American Spelling Bee Winner.

"Which part should I laugh?" Marcus C.H.Chan (Born in 1986); Schlumberger Engineer.

"Is this a joke or a statement?" Marcus C.H.Chan (Born in 1986); Schlumberger Engineer.

"我-就-是-不-相-信-！" Marcus C.H.Chan (Born in 1986); Schlumberger Engineer.




HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!

FEI Monthly October Issue

Deng deng deng deng~~~~~~~~~
After all the suffer we went through

Finally our very first FEI Magazine are out........
There are 5 winrar file
Download all and save in the same place and then extract the part 1 file.

If u found it interesting and want to join our editor group, you are all welcome :)

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Fei Questions and Answers (old collections)

Question: Nice photo! How did you take the shot?

Answer: use my camera...

Question: What's the heaviest mee on the world?

Answer: Wan Tan Mee (one tonne mee)

Question: What's the blackest money on the world?

Answer: 50 cent (the black rapper from US).

Question: Why superman's shirt is always so tight?

Answer: because "s" size....

Have a nice day people. :D

最常见的9种叫床声音，你喜欢哪种??

1. 手机闹钟铃声
2. 普通床头闹钟
3. 那种会满地打滚的变态闹钟
4. 被爸妈拎耳朵起床
5. 被同床的人一脚踢下床
6. 每天早上都叫人短信叫床
7. 每天早上都叫人电话叫床
8. 音响到点自动播放
9. 不要叫床，睡觉睡到自然醒

由于答案过于劲爆，请自行翻白（ctrl+a)

Farewell

Its almost 2 pm now, chill wind blowing on my face. Cant help but to feel sad that after five years, we will be parting ways and heading into divergent routes in our respective lives. I personally feel that these 5 years were not spent in vain, after having known all the greatest personalities on earth thus far.

We are not only university mates. We are not only friends. We are soul mates who have gone through the thick and thin of varsity lives. 5 years, if you ask me, is not a short time. There are many obstacles, challenges to face, spiritually, mentally and physically. But we are always there for each other, trying to pull our companions out from the sea of troubles.

So, my friends, you are indeed the greatest treasure that I have found after these 5 years. I fear that I cant repay all your kindness that you have offered. What I can do is to pray that each and every one of you will have a successful career in the future, as well as a very happy life with your families, current or would-be.

I also wish to offer you a song, always love (总有爱) by Beyond. Even in a room of darkness, there is always a glimpse of light, waiting to shine on you and guide you to the right path. Each word in this song represents the most sincere of words that I can offer to you:

总有爱

lyrics: ka keung
melody: ka keung

千般百股暖流　從你關心的說話
深深感激一切　我一生記心中
在急風撲面而來　迷失中找到你
我的心不須驚怕　有你伴我身邊

時光總飛逝　未能停留
容許多給你愛
以歌聲感激知心好友
我願為你高歌

有天可相聚　未曾遺忘
人海中得到你
與天邊中的海角與你
快樂地再高歌

風吹雨打過程　成我一生的鍛練
不懂哭泣衝刺　有歡呼有歌聲
讓心窩熾熱未來　人生中總有愛
以雙手驅走黑暗　有願望有星光

時光總飛逝　未能停留
容許多給你愛
以歌聲感激知心好友
我願為你高歌

有天可相聚　未曾遺忘
人海中得到你
與天邊中的海角與你
快樂地再高歌

Till we meet again.

Theme Song for CurryPuff Girls

This song is to credit a girl band in UTP graduating batch Jan 2010.
Not S.H.E.
Not SNSD.

But ... CurryPuff Girls!

Composer: Diane Warren ("I Don't Want to Miss A Thing")
Lyricist: Chong

...I don't want to miss lee teng ...
I don't want to miss ngai yoong ...
oh toh jia lin ...
and I don't want to miss a thing ...

痞子蔡欠扁问答题

狮子的哥哥叫什么？？

答案：狮子


答案请自行翻白（ctrl+a)

1 Malaysia

This karangan is what we call satu malaysia.....

国油电子电机工程系 (EE)的毕业歌

如果我這次猜拳猜輸了
會不會我就被神取消了 我愛你的資格
未來會怎樣誰敢保證呢
此時此刻怎麼輕飄飄的 好像不是真的
真的 以為情歌還不都是騙人的
真的 忘了變成啞巴有多久了

依依不捨 捨不得 地球上最浪漫的一首歌
我怕太超現實的快樂 只是你借給我的
緊緊抱著 擁抱著 地球上最浪漫的一首歌
我的靈魂二十一公克 因為你而完整了 完美了

把此刻反摺反摺再反摺
摺成一萬一千一百一十零一隻千紙鶴
如果說夢是現實的反射
能不能就這樣讓我們賴在一起睡著了
真的 自己原來還有做夢的資格
原來 傷過心的心還是肉做的

依依不捨 捨不得 地球上最浪漫的一首歌
我怕太超現實的快樂 只是你借給我的
緊緊抱著 擁抱著 地球上最浪漫的一首歌
我的靈魂二十一公克 因為你而完整了 完美了

依依不捨 捨不得 地球上最浪漫的一首歌
我怕太超現實的快樂 只是你借給我的
緊緊抱著 擁抱著 地球上最浪漫的一首歌
我的靈魂二十一公克 因為你而完整了 完美了

把不可能 變可能 地球上最浪漫的一首歌
你眼神裡那一種光澤 心裡還是熱熱的
最親愛的 心愛的 地球上最浪漫的一首歌
把苦苦的變的甜甜的 因為你失而獲得 找到了~~~

为什么？ 因为: 依依不舍 舍不得 地球上最浪漫的一首歌 (EE 不舍 舍不得）